top of page
Search
Writer's pictureElena Alférez

5.-Have you ever wondered why you chose your partner?

Why did you choose your partner?. I suppose you might think: well, because I really liked them, because we had the same life goals, because we were very attracted to each other... well, there's something more than that.



What lies behind attraction and falling in love?. The answer could be found in biological decoding. The first thing we must know is that our romantic relationships are influenced by the transgenerational mandates of our families. Many times, we seek what we know, what is imprinted in our DNA. Do phrases like "all men/women are the same," "I never have luck in love," or "I always end up with the same idiot" sound familiar to you?. Those beliefs and family patterns influence how we choose our partners. And now comes the important part.


Furthermore, in a romantic relationship, two family systems come together. In our cells, there is information from at least four generations. Watch out, things can get messy there. Your parents learned from your grandparents, and all the unfinished stories are always repeated for healing. That's why we often find ourselves repeating patterns from our ancestors without even realizing it. What a mess!.


A typical example of this can be seen in the movie Coco, where the great-great-grandmother is deeply in love, they have a daughter, and the father leaves to work with his guitar and never returns. Well, he doesn't return because he actually dies. What happens there?. A belief is established that men hurt women, men always leave, they are a source of pain, men will leave you hanging. And the mother, the grandmother, and the whole family system that is present at that moment will take care of transmitting that message, directly or indirectly, that "men are dangerous."


That's the message that is transmitted to Miguelito in the movie. Additionally, the movie shows how transgenerational influences also affect one's profession. Everyone has to make shoes because making music is dangerous. As if one thing wasn't enough, there's another.


If there has been a history in your family of men abandoning women, you may be afraid of committing to a relationship because, unconsciously, you believe that men always leave. If there has been a pattern in your family where one member cancels themselves out and assumes the role of caregiver for the other, it is likely that you tend to assume the same role in your romantic relationship. And there are many other examples like these.


It is important to be aware of these family patterns and mandates in order to choose from a more free and conscious perspective. Biological decoding helps us identify and heal these unconscious patterns, so we can make healthier decisions in our relationships.


Let's remember that a romantic relationship is about two people, 50% and 50%. This is not a competition of "who has the heaviest suitcase." No, no, the responsibility here is shared, like in those group projects at school where one person always ended up doing all the work. Ah, what nostalgia!


In this decoding adventure, we must remember that communication is key, but not just any communication. It's not about sending encrypted messages or miming to express what we feel. No, no! That's not fair!. We can't play "guess what I want" because nobody has superpowers (unless they have a cape hidden in the closet, in which case, congratulations!). We have to speak clearly and directly. If we want a healthy relationship, we must share our thoughts, emotions, and even our bad jokes.


In conclusion, love doesn't have to be an indecipherable mystery. As we heal the wounds of the past and take control of our choice of partner, we can write our own romantic comedy, filled with laughter, complicity, and true love. So let's hit the dance floor and dance to the rhythm of biological decoding towards healthier and more fun relationships!.



2 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Comments


bottom of page